Dead zombies

Good evening. Tonight a report has just come in, as another vital sector is hit by the recession. Dead zombies have been fired tenned on a large scale: employers hope that many (limbs) may be lost through "natural" wastage.

And now – the weather. Most parts of the country are still subject to weather but cut-backs have meant that parts of Wales and the Isle of Man are no longer receiving weather. *

Stir fried chicken are reported to be invading Hong Kong – here is a diagram of John Major's brain ----> · (to scale).

* Dear Sir,
I hope you are well & having weather...